Planet of the Monyets: How to succeed in job interviews

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Since 1995, I have been interviewing people seeking employment. I thought I should share my experience. I am generally carefully with the interviews and employment ? we after all are a consultancy and the quality of people is very crucial to our business. We don?t have machines and property. All we have is our people ? hence interviews and employment is a very important matter to me.

The number one mistake candidates make is not knowing who their prospective employer is. I expect the candidates who come for an interview to have done their homework ? find out what the company does, what is the core business, does it have branch offices, who is the CEO, has it got any specific policies, etc. In these days of the internet, much of these information can be easily obtained. I have had morons who come to an interview and ask me ?excuse me, can you tell me what this company does??. That?s an automatic fail. Nothing can make up for this laziness. To those of you going for interviews, for goodness sake ? spend a couple of hours Googling your prospective employer. Ask your friends. Ask your lecturers. Find out all you can about the company. The more you know, the more interested you appear to your interviewer. Better still, you can even ask your interviewer specific questions about the company. For example, you can ask ?I read on your website that you have a road project in Kemaman. I come from Kemaman. Can you tell me more about that project?? You need to demonstrate interest in the job and organization that you want to work for. Job interview tip # 2
"What is the salary?" should NEVER NEVER be your first question. Never ask about holidays and bonuses before you discuss what and how you can contribute. I have had several candidates who first question was ?how much is the salary?? ? and the interviews did not last very long. [a worse question is ?can I get an advance??] Be early for your interview. As a rule of thumb, arrive 10 ? 15 minutes early. Those who arrive early give impression that they are disciplined and eager. In my books, tardiness for an interview is a big NO. Any candidate who arrives late for an interview with me, loses 50% of the points right at the start. Regardless of the reason. Excuses such as ?I had difficulty finding the office? or the ?traffic was bad? are very lame, not acceptable in my books. If you are not familiar with the interview venue, do a reconnaissance visit a few days earlier or leave for the interview an hour earlier than what is required. When you are late, you are not calm, you tend to panic, you sweat and you often lose the train of thought. And the interviewer thinks you are indisciplined. Arriving early allows you the opportunity to check out the office setting. You could read the company?s policies often framed on the walls. You get to fill up whatever application forms unrushed. You might even have a little time to make small talk with the company staff attending to you. Arriving early shows you are responsible.

Job interview tip # 4

It is okay for you to ask your interviewer questions. Many interviewers like candidates who are lively during interviews and who ask thoughtful questions. You can ask questions such as ?I read from your website that you have many projects in Sarawak. Would I get an opportunity to work on those projects?? or ?what is the company?s policy on continuous professional development??. Do not ask dumb questions like "how many Chinese/Malays work here?" or "can I bring my cat to the office every day?" or "what's the name of that cute receptionist"? Job interview tip # 5
Do not insist on bringing your father or mother into the interview room. It is okay to ask your parents, uncles, grandmother, etc to drive you to the interview venue BUT as far as possible, ask them to wait outside. You would not look very cool telling your interviewer ?my mum is waiting for me outside? ? it may inadvertently send out a message that you are still a little boy/girl, clinging to your mother?s apron. Job interview tip # 6
You are there for a job interview. Dress appropriately. By doing your homework, you can learn about the company work culture and try to dress accordingly. If in doubt, over dress rather than under dress. Even if you are applying to become a stripper or a butt plug tester, the same rule applies. Dress appropriately. Job interview tip # 7
Do not bitch about your university, your lecturers, your previous employers, your wife, your boyfriends, your cat, the government, the industry, etc. Do not bitch about anything. Be civil. When you bitch about others, you really won?t make a good impression. The interviewer would probably think ?if she is bitching so much about her previous employer, she probably will bitch about us when she leaves this company?. Bitching never wins points (unless the interviewer is a bitch) Job interview tip # 8
Thank the interviewer at the end of the interview. Thank the interviewer's secretary as you leave. Thank the receptionist as you leave. Do not get offended if the interviewer was harsh or rude to you. Sometimes, they are testing your temperament. Some companies observe how you interact with the administrative staff or the receptionist to really understand your character. Job interview tip # 9
Almost all interviewers will ask you "tell me something about yourself". Plan and prepare thoroughly for this question. Tell things that highlight your strength and demonstrate your qualifications for the job.?There is no excuse for doing a bad job on this question ? this is a question that you can really prepare for. [btw, you do not have to tell them about the time that you were constipated for 8 days in a row unless you are applying for the butt-plug testing job]. Do not beg for the job. Show that you are interested. Show that you are competent for the job. Never, never, beg for the job.

Source: http://planetofthemonyets.blogspot.com/2012/11/how-to-succeed-in-job-interviews.html

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